lynn monahan

Now today I’m really feeling like myself again.  I walked on the beach this morning (I counted 200 steps to the beach from here) – Doing some laundry – have some chores to do and on my to-do list is to work on my book for the writing workshop for tomorrow.  So what am I doing? Watching Price is Right, drinking coffee and eating cookies.  I upgraded my phone though to IOS 10.0.2. That should count for something, right?  It did change the appearance on the phone. This is something really important in life, right?  The way my cell phone display looks?

Since I’m procrastinating I thought “why not blog?” and so here I am.

My doctors appointments are all completed. Tooth is in, skin is good, I even got some of those nasty skin tags removed although at the moment they look even nastier BUT I believe the beauty part will come soon and then the last appointment was the blood work yesterday which I survived.  I’ll get a phone call with those results.  So that’s all done and that’s all good.  I’m also here to settle the storage unit issues and I’m moving right along there so I really do think my time here has been productive. I’m feeling good.

I got a call yesterday from a temp agency in Richmond.  I have a Skype interview with them on Monday which means I will still be here in Florida then. I am taking full advantage of the time I have being on-line. I had to complete those Prove-it tests…again…the ones that test your competencies in data entry, Word, Excel, and typing – I got 100% on all of them.  HOWEVER, my typing speed at 1 minute was only 69 words a minute – no errors, but still.  That’s pretty low for me. Mrs. Besong is definitely ahead of me.  Oh well.  So now watch I’ll get a job in Richmond, repack the car and head north.  If there is a hurricane again I’m not moving.  I’m not!

I really thought I had something else to say but apparently today is a blank-mind day.  Maybe I’ll go clean out the refrigerator for something to do.  OR maybe I’ll take my book over to the beach.  Hmmm, wonder which it’ll be.

xoxoxo

Seriously, do I even have a normal these days? I have to say it feels pretty normal being back in Florida.  I stopped by my old neighborhood last night and after the initial tears which I choked back it just seemed pretty normal to walk on the beach with my neighbor friend and watch the sunset. The beach does seem particularly deserted since I left a month ago.  I left on Labor Day so this must be what it’s like 150 steps from the beach after school starts.  I’m thinking it’s pretty much like heaven now.  Stephanie also lives about 150 steps to the beach, maybe 200 steps, but I have not been over there to walk yet.  Why? Doctors appointments and job hunting of course.

My dentist and doctors appointments have had great results so that’s something going well. Also, I’m stopping by the storage unit daily waiting for the inspiration as to figuring out what to do with it all.  I believe I am formulating a plan which I won’t share because it could all change tomorrow.  I’ll share once it’s finalized. It’s hard though.  It’s hard to know what to do with a lifetime of things when you have no where to keep them.  Trying to decide what to keep, where to keep it, how to keep it and will you ever recover from parting with all those “things” that you have collected over your lifetime.  LIFETIME.  So I have a lot of emotional separation going on over this but I think I’m coming to terms with it.  Slowly, but still getting there. Once I get to “happy” about it I’ll make my move.  And I really think I’m going to get there.  It will certainly be freeing.  Well, maybe it won’t be. If I was confident it would be freeing I would be “there” by now.  But what I’m afraid of is that it will be devastating.  I’m somewhere between devastated and freeing.  Again, I’ll get there.  I really think I will.

I may have some internal functioning problem thing going on with this blog. Seems like nobody got “dinged” the other day when I posted about the harrowing trip from Richmond to here.  I apologize for my lack of technical blogging expertise. Another thing that I will get figured out while I have the use of internet!  Now that feels normal – being able to check emails, apply to jobs and blog at will.  THAT is normal for me.  Unplugged at my moms in Virginia, well that’s a struggle.  Mom also told me it’s cold there and she’s glad that I’m not there because #1 she’d have to turn the heat on for me and #2 she knows how uncomfortable I’d be.  But I tell you it should be my duty to be there and pay for her to turn the heat on so SHE’s not uncomfortable ya know?  The blind woman in the woods?  Have I deserted her?  I think she should come live with me in Florida during the winter.  I have suggested that to her. Of course I don’t know how Stephanie would feel about a blind woman bunking with us, but….

Anyway, mom would never leave her house so moving here, even if it would ever be a possibility on my end, would never be a possibility because she wouldn’t leave her house…probably.  I guess once I get extremely wealthy (or even get a steady paycheck) I could just pay for that stinkin oil so she can turn it on without fear of the cost.  How awful is that?  What is wrong with this world?  Wouldn’t it be nice to allow any senior citizen who lives solely on social security to not have to pay any utility bills, especially heat?  Electricity? Water?  Like the necessities of life should be free to marginally poor senior citizens. I can’t blog about this now because it’s making me feel really bad about being here in the warmth of Florida.

Check out this weather forecast for next week:

I know alot of people are loving fall/autumn right now but personally, the month I spent up north was mostly rainy and miserable.  A sunny fall day IS really a perfect day but they were so few and far between when I was there.  Maybe that grey (gray?) cloud followed me there but it sure looks like it’s not followed me here.

Okay, enough of the weather report.  Time to go read.  My friend, A.K. Downing (her professional name) has written a book.  It’s really good!  I’m sucked in.  I need to finish it so I can write a review.  But I will tell you all now that it’s good and you should all buy one and buy one for a friend. Into the Air – check out her website.

xoxoxo

I had thought of many titles for this blog.  Some of the choices included:

• I told you so
• Never-ever again
• Mom knows best
• There is a God

All those titles are suitable but I chose A Labor of Love, because Labor I did and I’m back in Florida which I love. I had to get this story on paper while it is fresh in my mind…and surprisingly I’m still awake.

Here’s the background..

As most of you know I have this dental issue.  Crowns, etc.  And I have paid for this crown in Florida, now wearing a temporary, I wanted to come back to get my permanent crown.  So #1 I want my new crown, it’s paid for.  #2, I have a doctor here and we have a history and she knows my cholesterol issue and is watching a couple of other things for me.  #3 I need to see a dermatologist and well I have one of those in Florida too so here’s what I did:  I made all three appointments for this week, in Florida and decided I’d come this week and get the doctors appointments out of the way and hopefully figure out what to do with my storage and wrap up some odds and ends here in Florida.  Okay, sooo. Here we go…

Last Thursday, I get a phone call from the temp agency down here in Florida.  She has a job for me that starts on Monday.  I said PERFECT!! Not a “perfect” job but not bad, it was a temporary job, close to Stephanie’s (and where I used to live) so good this will work out well.  I’m leaving Friday and I’ll get in Saturday and be ready Monday.  I was also trying to get here for a party on Saturday in Pass-a-grille and meet some friends for the party.  So great I’m leaving Friday.  Then she calls back and said “wait, you can’t start Monday, you have to start Friday – to which I say “impossible – I can’t get there Friday.  It’s already Wednesday and it takes two days.”  So, oh well, so much for that, but still I’m heading down Friday, right?

Wrong, in comes Hurricane Matthew pounding the coast and no way I can leave Friday. I’d be driving right into the storm.  Not only can I not leave Friday I can’t leave until Sunday.  The temp agency calls me back and says the job said they’d take me as soon as I can get there.  Perfect again right?  I mean I have that car payment plus. So now I’m more motivated to get here because I also have a job.

Matthew hits the coast and then we even got lots and lots of rain at mom’s but no wind thankfully and no damage at her house, although I did have to get water out of the basement before I left.  I woke up Sunday, packed up the car with enough stuff to stay an indefinite amount, so like summer clothes, fall clothes, a sweater and sweatshirts, all my shoes, bathroom stuff, bills and stuff cause who knows how long this job will last.  Mom is nervous about me leaving because of the storm but I assure her that I have SIRI, there will be detours and I can get around the road closures. I need the job I tell her, I need the income.  I’ll be fine.

The very first road by my mom’s was closed and I had to find a way around that.  Once on the highway it was smooth, but windy conditions.  95 was open, clear, the sun was shining.  SIRI warned me of a couple of closures and took me right around and back on 95.  Easy-peazy. Although some of the work arounds were scary.

Then SIRI tells me to get off at a certain exit but I decide I’m going to follow the traffic because there was no warning of a road closure and well maybe she’s wrong.  This was the beginning of the nightmare.

I sat on I95 with hundreds of other people wondering what in the world was going on.  SIRI and all satellite service went down. I couldn’t even check Facebook while sitting there, I couldn’t get on the internet and google anything, I couldn’t text and I couldn’t call anyone.  I sat.  When finally we moved we all came to find out that I95 was closed and all of us had to exit.  Single lane and we all had to go left and get back on I95 going north.  I could see that I95 south was under water:

That’s all that we knew – SIRI is still not working.  There was a gas station (I still had a half  tank) but the electricity was off so no gas.  However I really had to go to the bathroom and they said no bathrooms.  It was bad.  This was a little strip plaza mall right beside the gas station, under water:

Okay, now I’m going north on I95, no idea what to do or where to go so I just decide to call it a night because now it’s around 6:00 and it’s getting dark so I see an exit with Holiday Inn and a couple other large chain hotels.  I stop at a Comfort Suites and at least got to use the bathroom in the pitch black (used my phone for light) – when I inquired about a room they explained that they didn’t have any available because they’re not sure who was checked out and couldn’t clean the rooms.  I ran into a woman in the lobby who was also trying to get to Jacksonville (that was my original goal for the day) and she said she was going to head north until she saw electricity and get a room.  I decided a good idea.

So now I’m heading north.  I haven’t eaten since a pack of crackers I had at breakfast.  Luckily I wasn’t hungry – probably from the stress and good thing because with all the power out there were no choices of places to eat anyway.  Okay Okay so now I’m heading north and somewhere in there Stephanie calls me as she was trying to help me get a room with her points so she starts looking on line for hotels.  I told her I saw lights off an exit ahead so I was exiting. I exit and the lights that I saw turned out to be headlights as there was NOTHING off the exit, just another highway.  So I start following this highway and follow signs for Elizabethtown. I just thought maybe there would be something there.  Stephanie is panicking along with me telling me there are no Marriotts in Elizabethtown and I have to turn back and go to Lumberton.  I told her NO! Lumberton has no power and I’m not going back there. She really argued with me so I told her to call Lumberton and if they answered and had electricity I would go back – Still I have no SIRI though and wouldn’t know how to get back there.  She called and there was no answer and then believed me that it was not an option.

Then in the middle of nowhere there is a Marathon Gas Station – open with lights – I was even able to use my credit card and got a full tank AND a paper map.  I was enthused and kept going towards Elizabethtown certain to find something. There was ONE Knights Inn listed and when I called for a room the main reservation line said they were completely sold out.  Undeterred and without any other choices I kept going.

Elizabethtown was pitch black – no lights whatsoever.  I happened to find the Knights Inn and stopped anyway. The lobby was open with candlelight. It was sketchy but I was tired. It was now 8:30 and I had been on the road since 10 am.  Normally a 3 hour trip – 4 at the most – took me 10 hours so far.  Anyway, they said they had plenty of rooms but were taking cash only.  The room was $70.  I had $72 cash.  So there was that. Good news bad news as I had other plans for that $70 but…So I got a room, no card key.  The end of that part is I slept in my clothes, shoes and all, on top of the bed.  The pillow was comfortable and I actually slept through the night. They had given me two tea light candles.  I think it was a blessing I couldn’t see the rest of the room.  I slept through and got up early and got a freezing cold shower and hit the road again.  Another sunny day.  Met another Florida bound comrade in the parking lot who asked me what I thought I’d do – which way I’d go – and I said I was just going to follow SIRI and he said he was going to try 41 (I found out later 41 was under water so he would not have made it.)

SIRI took me on a round about in the middle of no where:

20 miles into the detour she took me right to a road under water, then she quit working, totally. I figured no problem and that I would just go back the 20 miles the way I came but soon came to find out that I was lost. I had no idea where I was, no SIRI and there were down power lines in front of me.  I stopped and waited until I saw someone go over them then I did it too.

I was seconds away from turning North and going to back to Mom’s when Stephanie calls (and gets through!) I was telling her that I couldn’t find my way out – 95 was still closed and I didn’t know what to do.  Then I came upon another gas station – no gas available – no power – but somehow they had coffee and I had $2 left.  I sat in the parking lot and talked to Stephanie telling her the map was useless because it doesn’t show the back roads and it certainly doesn’t show the closed roads.  She was telling me to stop and ask at an IHOP.  I told her the only thing I was seeing were cotton fields:

But then she found a website called something like NC closed roads – In this miracle moment (looking back) I got a signal for about 5 minutes, found the website and saw that 410S and 74 West were marked green (meaning open) – the gas station happened to be on 410.  Then I lost the signal, but I had written it down and off I went. This route took me pretty far south and then back up north and west and supposedly was going to hook up with 95 after all the road closures in Fayetteville.  SIRI would interrupt every so often and tell me to turn here and there and I would just say “fuck you SIRI, I’m going this way” – 410 was open all the way, phew – and I got on 74 and started heading west and then I came to a spot where the road was under water, so I pulled over.  Everyone else was going through it.  You know exactly what they tell you NOT to do. I watched several cars go through.  I waited for about 20-30 cars, watched another low car and figured if they all get through I’ll go too.  And I did, go through, and I made it.

I passed a gas station that must have had power because the lines were incredibly long.

And then I got to 95 South – it was open – North was closed but I was going South. So South I went,  It took me two hours to get to that point.  I was probably 30 minutes away in Elizabethtown. Although there were hundreds of trees down along the road I95 through South Carolina they had cleared them from the roads.  There was water on either side in many places but again nothing “on” the road.  10 hours later I landed in Florida at Stephanie’s.

I heard that at some point during the day the levee in Lumberton where Stephanie was begging me to go to last night – broke and 1000+ people were being rescued on top of their houses etc. I also saw that both roads I took this morning are now closed, under water in spots, and I would not have gotten out.

I cried when I got on 95 and cried when I parked the car here. It was a long harrowing day.

I thought about my luck in running into that lady in the lobby (who I never saw again – an angel maybe?)  in getting off that exit last night when I had no idea where I was going – finding an open gas station – with power – In finding a room to sleep in even though I was told they were sold out.  In having $70 cash to pay for the room. In being able to sleep. Having Stephanie find that website and having 5 minutes of signal to see a green open route and then staying wide awake without incident getting here.  So happy to be in the warmth of Florida.  God was really liking me on this trip. There are so many horrible ways this story could have ended or still been going on but I’m here. Thank God, like for real I’m thanking God.

HOWEVER, I called the agency to tell them I was going to be here today.  They called back and said the first job fell through but they had a second job for lesser pay and an hour commute.  Downtrodden to say the least, knowing I still have a car payment plus other bills I knew I had to take it anyway. So depressed that I’m a bad person (at least in the area of career) I said okay and was told I had to start the next morning at 8 am and probably work the weekend but would get a day or so off next week and I’d have to cancel my doctor’s appointments. I mean the doctors appointments were the main reason for coming here – right?  Mom (in her new role of calming me down) convinced me to just wait and see what happens, which I did, having no choice anyway, and by 6 pm the agency called back and said that one fell through too.  Sooo, the whole push to get here, through the hurricane mess to start the job, to pay the bills is now a non-issue.  I have no job. I have enough clothes and supplies to last through December.  WTF

But here I am. I do not know if I’m staying just a week for the appointments and storage wars or will I stay longer and try again to be employed in Florida?  And what about leaving mom when didn’t I just say I didn’t think I could leave her?  And then I left her?  I have bills, I need to pay them.  I have to go where the job is.  I came here to where the job is, and then it isn’t.  That God has an odd sense of humor, but apparently was looking out for my safety, in a really big way.

I’m in my beautiful Guest bedroom in Stephanie’s house. She worked really hard to make it so nice for me.  I left most of my things in the car.  I basically live out of my car, but I’m thankful for good friends and family who let me “sponge” off of them.  I have a lot of paying back to do to friends and to God.

xxoxoxo

Remember my little jade tree?  The one that used to be the BIG jade tree that fell over?  Look – it’s getting stronger.  It likes it here on my mother’s porch.

Exactly 50 miles for my errands. That included the library, farmers market, Food Lion, the seamstress, Wegmans (for things that Food Lion didn’t have) and finally the Dollar Store because they are the only ones that carry the Kleenex box size my mother uses. It’s a lot of running around.  I don’t do that all the time.  Maybe once a week.

Speaking of cars (we were sort of) my car is doing great (knock on wood all together now).  I drove it here to Virginia of course (from Florida) then up to Pittsburgh over the weekend, in torrential rain on the way there, like really really harrowing scary rain and it did great.  However, those roads getting from the Southside up to Mt. Washington, well they aren’t even roads.  At one point the GPS was telling me to take a right and I didn’t see a road.  I drove by again and I’m like there is NO way that is a road and if it is who would take their car down it?  It was crazy.  So I would not want to keep my car in Pittsburgh.  I also don’t know about having this “sports” car in this area.  It seems like I need an SUV or something with four wheel drive.  I have a lot to think about where that car is concerned but for now it is not failing me and I’m loving it.  I wonder how long you can keep a car without making payments.

It is peaceful here in the woods but you people with big houses…:-)… when I’m not running errands or running somewhere to get an internet connection I’m cleaning screens, washing windows, doing yard work, cleaning floors. So not a lot of peace going on. There is a lot of upkeep.  Not that my mom doesn’t keep up with it but I’m here so shouldn’t I be doing it?  Isn’t that why I’m here?  Well, as my sister was quick to remind me when I mentioned that I think I need to stay here with my mom, she reminded me that I have no choice.  I have no where else to go.  Thanks for that sis.  But it’s true.  Although now I’m feeling that I “need” to stay, but again, my sister is right, I don’t have a choice, not like I’m here out of the kindness of my heart or like I made some sacrifice to take care of my mom.  Not that I’m NOT taking care of my mom…but you know, it’s the circumstances that led me here.  Someone mentioned to me recently that this is a nice reprieve for me.  Nothing was nicer than the reprieve I had living at the beach in 400 sq. ft. Nothing.

But here I am.

I have a friend – go me.  Lori, who I went to Edinboro with all those years ago, lives here in the area.  She’s relatively new to the area too so hasn’t made a lot of friends yet.  However, she said she was invited to Bunko and they said she could bring a friend!  How fun is that?  She’s visited here today and we drove around Goochland County (where I live) and then next time I’ll head over her way.  I’m very excited to have a friend.  Also, she rides (or used to ride) horses.  I mean could it be kismet? I gotta get my helmet and chaps out of storage. I gotta get a lot of things out of storage.  I have to get to my storage. That storage issue is a big headache.  But I’m not going to talk about that today.

I’ve been cooking very healthy food for me and mom so that’s nice for both of us.  She sure is enjoying that.  I “think” she likes me being here but is very concerned for my state of mind (she knows I’m sad and nervous about what’s next.) She is being very very kind and I couldn’t be in a better place under the circumstances. However, I don’t think she thinks for one minute that I’m staying here.  I’m not sure if she wants me to move back to Florida because she knows that’s what I want or if she wants her privacy back.  This is a very precarious predicament to be in because she would never want me to stay out of obligation, never! (see previous statement from my sister.)  So we will have to see how this plays out.  Wait and see.  It certainly is a new adventure.  It’s just instead of the move to Florida where I was 1000% all in and ready for that challenge, and so so so excited to move there, finally, I came here defeated, dejected, without a choice. And now I have to make the most of it.  A different adventure.  A different blog.  Instead of starting on this big high in Florida and falling down slowly I am looking forward to how I will rise above, starting out beaten down and rising above.  Maybe this is the wave Maryann was talking about.

Deconstruct to Reconstruct (Psych 101).

Ttfn..

xoxoxo

This is only one of such views on my way to the library where I access the internet.

In other news, I attempted to hook a TV up today, got a new antennae and nada. Even moved the TV to a higher floor, still NADA.  Guess it isn’t meant to be. I trust the VP debates will go on without me.  I will still be able to listen.  I am mostly interested in the hurricane.  My plan is to run (like in a brief visit) to Florida next week but not if mom is going to be slammed with a hurricane. So many variables in life, ya know?

I am running errands now – after my library visit.  I’m going to check the mileage just so you can get an accurate picture of this “country” living life that I am now in. There is no such thing as a quick trip to the store.

xoxxo

It’s hard to get back into the swing of things (and by things I mean blogging) after getting out of the routine. Without access to the internet, cell signals, TV, generally life in the 21st century (what century is this called anyway?) anyway, living in the woods just got me out of the habit.  There are other factors as well.  I decided to set up a “landing” page so to speak because when I start my next adventure I want to be ready to blog about that one too.  I’ll have to give it another name won’t I?  I’m still not sure what to call it as I’m not sure what the next adventure will entail. So this is “in the meantime” ramblings.  As you can see Finally Florida is now a link under the menu.  I’ve set myself up for failure…no wait that’s not what I meant to say… I’ve set myself up for the possibility of many new adventures and blogs to go with it, so I won’t have to keep everyone bouncing around they can all be located on one page.  That’s the hope anyway. Along with the hope that I get back into the habit of writing.  Some nights when I can’t sleep (which is like every night these days) I’ll start thinking of what I want to write and then when the time comes to write I go blank. Hormones? Weather changes?  I will, I’ll get settled, I’ll get back to it. I will. In the meantime here’s some pictures about my life this past month:

Views from mom’s neighborhood:

Mom has sunset’s too – I have to drive to see them but they are still pretty.

Post offices  – I kinda have a thing for these small post offices:

Pictures from Field Day of the Past.  An event with lots of farming equipment, animals, an amusement park section, food stuff, tractors, and tons of antique machine/engine/car stuff, a rodeo and this thing called a tractor pull. Lots of people watch that tractor pull.  It’s very loud and a lot of dirty smoke comes from the tractors that are pulling this big trailer thing with a weight on it. (I don’t have a picture of it) Kinda interesting and much less violent than the rodeo.  The whole day was fun, even going by myself.

The local bugs – wood bugs are different than beach/Florida bugs – at least the ones I have seen so far..oh how I remember stink bugs and now they are back in my life:

a quick trip to Virginia Beach – sand a little browner, water a lot colder:

and then finally a visit with the boys (views from Zach’s new place):

I have enjoyed my visit in Pittsburgh with the boys (and babies) and a saw a couple friends but tomorrow I head back to the Virginia woods.  I am hoping to return to Florida next week to wrap some things up but it’s going to depend on that hurricane. I’m not worried about it hitting Tampa, I’m worried about it hitting my moms. I can’t leave her in the middle of a hurricane so I am just going to have to wait and see what happens. THAT should be the name of the next blog.  Wait and see.. I kinda like it.

Sorry to make Janelly wait so long to get back up and running. Thanks for caring and for finding me again. I shall find my voice again soon.

xoxox

Could this be the new blog?  Is it too boring?  Too plain?  I’m looking for clean.  I think this could be it.