Today’s the day

I have not forgotten that I’m supposed to be a blogger. I have gone from Blogger, to Author to Publisher and now promoter.  It is soooo much work.  I can certainly see why you would pay someone to do all this for you.  It was suggested to me that now that I have figured out a lot of the formatting issues that I could also be a paid formatter of books.  But I would rather be a writer.  One thing that Finally Florida mentions continuously is the desire to be a writer, you know, like of books. So kinda cool that it happened, in the way that it happened, because I sure didn’t foresee turning all those blogs into a book.

On the subject of formatting, there are two versions out there.  Both have the same text/story but they have different covers.  One is through a company called Ingram Sparks that is the company used by bookstores and libraries and larger outlets, and then the other version is the book found through Amazon.  Had I known ahead of time how it all worked, I probably could have just picked ONE of those outlets and still sold on Amazon or I could have chosen expanded distribution through Amazon and skipped the Ingram Sparks version but alas I did not know prior to this shitshow of this process.  And now if I want it sold through Barnes and Noble I would have to pick yet ANOTHER version to format and upload and just enough already!  And really I don’t want to get bogged down in all the formatting, editing and subsequent marketing, I just want to get my silly stupid head back and blog about nothing.  So I’m putting marketing on hold.  I am only sharing these details to explain my blogging absence and because I’m exhausted from my day and rambling on about nothing seems to be my niche.  I will add that anytime I see someone post something about my book (like Peggy did last night about reading it) it is somewhat surreal.  It takes a moment to register, like wait, that looks familiar! Oh yea, it’s MY book!  HA!  So fun.

Otherwise, I am still retired, still loving it and still letting life unfold day in and day out. Today I am exhausted because I’ve been spending a lot of time with my 91-year-old mom who acts like she’s dying until you call hospice and then she tells them how great she feels and nothing hurts and then you just want to kill her. As soon as they leave then she’ll ask for help getting to the bathroom, after she tells them how spry she is. These old people. WORSE than those dam kids.  A representative from hospice just told us they had to release a 104-year-old who just kept getting better. That was not encouraging news to my mother who does not want to live until 104. I’ve been a hospice volunteer for some time now, but it is a totally different experience when it comes to your own parent. Well at least it is for me. It’s just she sits and tells us one thing and then when we try and get her help she tells them a completely different story. Her vitals are good.  Lungs, heart, blood pressure, oxygen, healthy as a horse.  She has no illnesses, no terminal condition.  Her knee hurts terribly from arthritis and originally she refused to do exercises or wear a brace or anything to help herself.  But in front of a doctor she’ll tell them it doesn’t hurt and then she says “of course I’ll do exercises” – when they leave she refuses.  PAIN IN THE A**.  It’s exhausting.  She could do things to help herself, she could walk more and it would help improve, but she is 91 and doesn’t want to do anything to improve.  And for never going to a doctor she is dam healthy, other than losing her sight, not a darn thing wrong with her.  Which under normal conditions, without the blindness and inability to walk without pain, would be so wonderful. I am told I should be happy that my mother is still living and I feel bad for everyone else in the world who says “I wish my mother was still alive” “you are so lucky” – but these are not lucky times. These are stressful and exhausting times. BUT I do feel fortunate that I am able to spend the time with her that I do.  It’s a very mixed blessing for sure. I’m thinking of turning the blogs that I wrote that came after Finally Florida, the blogs when I was living in Virginia with mom, into my next book. But there’s so much more to me and mom since that time, and apparently more to come. I think I have to wait awhile for that one.

For now I’m going to get caught up on some TV.  Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings.

xoxoxo

PS – today’s feature photo has no significance other than I wish I was there, on the beach…again…