The sun is shining (first, a rarity in these parts) and it is shining just so on my TV and TV stand and there is so much dust there that I can see now because of that rare sunshine. I am sitting here pondering. Do I get up and dust now? Get the Swiffer out? Or do I write a blog? Notice, the Blog has won out. I mean I really should dust there, and if I start there, then I will end up going all around the room and once I go around the room I will probably go into the bedroom and dust in there. But I do not always keep going. More often than not I will stop and decide to dust the bedroom tomorrow. I can dust that tomorrow. Not only because it’s Sunday but because now all my days are Sundays. I have recently asked Alexa to tell me every day what day it is and what day of the week it is. She didn’t get it and told me the weather. But still I need some sort of reminder. Working at home this last year I would wake up and have to purposely stop and think “is this a day I have to get out of bed?” or “is this a day I can roll over and go back to sleep?” Now I can roll over and go back to sleep every day, but I don’t. I still have a couple lingering commitments, i.e. a 10 am call on Tuesday, a noon call, every Wednesday, this past week I had a 9 am call on Monday. I know. I really had to get up that day. And now that I have the days to myself I have noticed I am getting up earlier, so I can enjoy the day! I don’t want to waste the days away. I want to enjoy them. But I obviously haven’t included dusting in that equation. I’ll get there. This is apparently a process.
One thing I have added to my day, every day, is Yoga. EVERY morning before I leave my bedroom, even before I have tea, I do 20 minutes (or 15) of Yoga. I mean all on my own. I’m not even forcing myself. I’m not even doing it because I think I “should” – I’m just doing it. I know it’s good for me, but I’ve always known it’s good for me. I was shaking my head thinking about last week’s yoga was 15 minutes (this week 20) but how easy would it have been for me to include that in my morning before work. You’d think it would be super easy, working from home. Roll out of bed and do the yoga and THEN turn on that stupid computer. But I was under so much stress I couldn’t even allow myself that 15 minutes. I mean how crazy is that? No one put that stress on me. No one ever said “be at your computer by 8 am” – No one. I did that to myself. I’m not spending too much time wondering why. I’m just accepting the fact that my stressors and my limitations and my unhappiness was all brought about on my own. The only thing that helps is that I’m not blaming anyone and not mad at anyone. I’m not even mad at myself. I’m just glad it spurred me to move on because I can not tell you how happy I am not having those stressors, whether or not they were self-inflicted they are just gone now and I spend an awful lot of time smiling.
I have heard from a few co-workers these past two weeks. Mostly saying hi, how’s it going. One guy I told him I was born to be retired and he responded that it was nice that I found my calling. How apropos. LOL. I met another friend for lunch and she brought me this huge present I was not expecting. That was fun. And I did hear from one PIA asking me where there were extra keyboards. You can tell by that question that he is one of those people that does not look before asking. Like your kids when they say “I can’t find xyz” and you respond “If I come up there and find it I’m gonna knock you out” because you KNOW they didn’t even look. Of course you don’t knock them out, but it did sometimes work that they would then quickly look before I got up the steps and would say “never mind!” Dam Kids. Anyway, so when this guy asked if I knew where the extra keyboards are and I said “my” desk drawer – well obviously he didn’t even look before the text. If he would have said “I looked there” then I would say “then how the fuck do I know?” but I didn’t say that. I was nice, because I am nice. But really I wanted to say, are you kidding me?.
I’m not gonna lie though, I did kind of like that he asked me. AND that I knew the answer. I mean it was a stupid question but I still knew the answer. It hasn’t left me totally yet. Work stuff. As for the hard stuff (questions) we will see if anyone asks me a hard question if I have retained any of that. Jordan suggested a month or so ago that I return to Point Park (college) and resume my old position of doing contracts. And you know what? I can’t remember how I did them. I know there’s a spreadsheet and a macro and some finangling – but that process has left my brain. As it should. It’s been 8 years since I left there. I’m sure it would come back to me but I don’t need to find out.
This is a weird weekend in the city. It’s race weekend. The Pittsburgh Marathon. So they have closed all the streets around me. It is so quiet for the city. There’s no people sounds and not a lot of traffic sounds because they can’t get here! But that also means I can’t get out. I had thought I had until 4 am to get my car out and come back but they posted a notice that I couldn’t get out this afternoon. I had plans tonight too so that was a pretty big disappointment. BUT I am learning to roll with the punches. And that isn’t even a punch. It’s just a thing. Which has caused me to sit here and write a blog and to ponder the dusting dilemma and to listen to the quiet and to think about getting out tomorrow and seeing those runners. You’d think the town would be hopping with runners but it’s just so quiet. Maybe they’re all carbing up somewhere. Or would they have done that Friday night?
Well I’m stuck in the city regardless. I guess it’s as good a time as any to get the Swiffer out and watch the last season of Grace and Frankie. Maybe start a movie. OR better yet maybe wait until tomorrow since I can’t go anywhere and watch a movie tomorrow. There’s something about allowing yourself a whole lazy day that is so decadent. A whole day. I think that day could be tomorrow. After I go cheer on a couple runners of course. THEN I’ll watch a movie. Ohhh I can’t wait. A reason for living. There are so many reasons now.
Xoxoxo