It’s Friday. You know what that means don’t you? Well yea, means different things to different people. At this very moment it means to me that I’m going to write a blog. Cause it’s Friday.
My mom visited this week, which was a very first since she moved up here from Virginia in 2019. My sister was getting her house exterminated so mom had to go for the afternoon. Not an easy feat because she is injured. When mom was in the shower, a week or so back, a big bottle of shampoo slid off the side of the tub and onto her foot. You would not believe how black and blue and swollen and painful it has become. Don’t you worry, Kerry took her to the hospital. It is not broken but nevertheless it is painful for her to walk on. So getting her in and out of the car and up here was a bit of a challenge but Kerry got her this walker on wheels that has a seat so she sat and I pushed and it went pretty smoothly. It’s all level from the car to the apartment but with an almost broken foot it makes it hard. That aside, we had a perfectly lovely day on her very first visit. Really it was nice. She did complain (good naturedly) about the city noise. I know she likes fresh air (as do I) so I kept the window open for the air but the traffic and city noise is relentless. They say you get used to it, and I am getting used to it but that window would be closed a lot more if I had to have conversations with anyone. It’s loud. That aside she joked that she wanted to come twice a week. Good thing I work at home.
In the big moveout, when we sold mom’s house, I kept all her albums (lp’s, vinyl, whatever they’re called these days) and subsequently bought a record player with the intent to play her the albums when she visited. And look at that! Two years later and I got to do it. So many of the albums I grew up listening to. When we were kids she played showtunes all the time. ALL the time. The soundtrack to The Fantasticks is one of my favorites. I’ve never seen the play. I’ve never even seen it advertised. I don’t even know what it’s about, but I know all the words to all the songs. Mom admitted she never saw it either but we love the music. Other’s in the day’s line up were Brigadoon, Hello Dolly and I even have Barbara Streisand’s 2nd album ever (not a show tune). Barbara always brings a tear to her eye. She feels like she discovered her back in the day and has always loved her voice. Who doesn’t? Anyway, so many memories listening to those albums. I remember us dancing around the family room as kids. Fun fun memories.
If you remember my blog from last week and the dragonfly meaning transition, I think it might be happening. The reason I think this is a possibility is that one of these albums brought up a memory that at another time in my life might have been cause for embarrassment. But I shared this particular memory, with my mom (another first for me as not a story I would typically share with her)and well I laughed and laughed as well as remembering the time fondly. The memory was brought up by an album by Vaughn Williams, which reminded me of a time I went to the Symphony with a date where they played Vaughn Williams and we both had tears in our eyes it was so beautiful. I don’t remember which piece was played but I remember the name Vaughn Williams and my date, who was 12 years younger than me. Who was he you ask? Well, Sally, Liz and I were at Metropol, I believe it was 1990, and this very cute boy just grabbed me to dance and well it was so fun, and he was so stinkin cute. He was visiting from California and in college. So you know, that’s not that young, right? And I mean I was 31 or so. Maybe 32. Well anyway, it was so funny when I went running up to Sally and Liz saying “what should I do, what should I do? He wants my phone number” They were behind me 1000% – DO it, DO it!! (they said) It is such a fun memory, because luckily, he was not an ax murdered or a pervert. I had not thought about this in a long time, but the Vaughn Williams album brought back all those memories. Isn’t that something how a song can do that? Daniel’s, the boy’s, only fault, at the time, was he was not old enough to be in Metropol (so younger than I originally thought) and well I was probably closer in age to his father. I remember he told me that his dad said if he didn’t want to ask me out, his dad would. I mean that’s kinda funny. His dad was kidding of course. Just his way of saying I may have been a little too old for his son. His father was also a Pittsburgh Symphony patron and had season tickets and so we went and saw Vaughn Williams and it was ridiculously romantic. Mom asked me what happened between us and I admitted that it was probably due to my drinking problem at the time, over indulging and making a complete ass of myself at a grown-up event we went to with his father, and the fact that he was in college, in California and a kid. I think the last time I talked to him was to tell him I was pregnant with Jimmy (months after he went back to college..) A relationship was not really in the cards for us. But honestly I love that memory, and I learned my lesson and quit drinking and I even still remember his whole name!
I used to be (and probably still mostly am) embarrassed of all the “mistakes” I’ve made. You know in movies when people are dying and they say “no regrets, I have no regrets” I often ask myself, “how do you get there?” But my visit with my mom the other day, and sharing that story with her and you, and laughing, and not beating myself up about the drinking, well it’s like I’ve matured and have started to accept myself. I feel like a grown up. Maybe I’m on my way to that “no regrets” stage. That will be very freeing if/when I get there. A transition for sure.
Also, just to clear – Daniel was old enough that he was not illegal. I’m just saying that to clear anyone’s doubts. And he is probably 50 now! And well that means now we’re the same age. 😉
xoxoxo